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The novel is considered the holy grail of writing; a means through which some of the best writers of all time portrayed their literary genius. It’s a beast, a gargantuan; it’s arguably the most difficult piece of writing one could attempt to conquer.

It’s no secret that writing a novel is hard. Just look at all your failed attempts, and the subsequent tears you shed when the disappointment kicked in. The novel is an emotional roller coaster of desperation and despair and triumph and pain and losses and victory. It’s all of these emotions that make it so damn difficult.

Based on all this, if you had the chance to go back and start your journey over, would you? If the answer turned out to be yes, here are five things you’d want to know before beginning that journey again.

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#1: That Buying Printer Ink Is A Pain

By this point, you’ve probably given up on ye ole handwritten edits and annotations. Not because you don’t enjoy the process and think it makes for a pleasant change, but because going to the store to buy printer ink so often is one of the most disgusting thoughts in the entire world.

Hasn’t anyone ever shown you MS Word’s Track Changes?

#2: It’s Harder To Think Of Three Words Than Eighty-Thousand

Why is it that you can sit and write eighty-thousand words without much difficulty, especially when the process is compared to that of coming up with a title? It’s like your mind turns into gunk when writing your title – and not the cool kind you get in kids’ chemistry sets…

Here’s to all those hours spent Googling random titles in the hope that some inconsiderate, time-travelling moron hasn’t visited the future and stolen your genius.

#3: Tense Consistency Is Hard

It’s no great secret that tense consistency is one of the most difficult things to get right in writing – that was even more of an issue when writing a novel.

Hope you saw what we did there, or else we just look dumb.

Seriously though. Tense consistency is damn hard. One slight glitch in the system and you’re left scanning the same sentence a bazillion times over, self-debating on whether or not ‘had’ is a word.

#4: Criticism Hurts

Even when it’s constructive.

There’s nothing easy about having your work – your flesh, blood and bone; your baby – picked apart page by page, exposing each and every flaw, with suggestions centered around improving your terribleness.

Ouch.

But hey, at least the manuscript will be polished, right? RIGHT?!

#5: Subconscious Knockoffs Are Still Knockoffs

No matter how much you wish they weren’t.

Okay, so you didn’t mean for your main character to bear a striking resemblance to a famous author’s main character, so that makes it okay, right?

Wrong.

It’s still a ripoff. You still need to rewrite the character…

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Now, Back To Your Novel

Have fun!

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